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Joke: An English Lesson About "Fuck"

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "fuck." It is the one magical word, just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. Fuck, as most words in the English language, takes its name from the German word "fricken," which means "to strike."

"Fuck" falls into many grammatical categories.

It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John fucked Mary) and intransitive (Mary was fucked by John).

It can be an active verb (John really fucks up) or a passive verb (Mary doesn't really give a fuck), an adverb (Mary is fucking interested in John), and a noun (Mary is a fine fuck).

It can be used as an adjective (Mary is fucking beautiful).

As you can see, there are not many words with the versatility of "fuck."

Besides its sexual connotation, this lovely word can be used to describe many situations:

Fraud I got fucked at the used car lot. Dismay Oh, fuck it! Trouble I guess I'm fucked now. Aggression Fuck you! Passive Fuck me. Confusion What the fuck? Difficulty I can't understand this fucking business. Despair Fucked again. Apathy Who gives a fuck. Incompetence He's all fucked up! Laziness He's a fuck off. Displeasure What the fuck is going on here? Ignorance Fuck if I know. Defiance The fuck you can! Lost Where the fuck are we? Authority Shut the fuck up.

It can be used in descriptive anatomy - He's really a fucking asshole. It can be used to tell time - It's five fucking thirty. It can be used in business - How did I get this fucking job? It can be a prediction - Oh, will I get fucked. It can be maternal - as in "Mother Fucker." It can be nautical - Fuck the Admiral. It can be political - Fuck Reagan. It can open the door to wonderful relationships - "Let's fuck." It can be used just to enhance the meaning of a word - as in "Beautifuckingful" or "Terfuckingific." The mind fairly boggles at the many creative uses. How can anyone be offended when you say "Fuck"? Use it in your daily speech, it adds to your prestige.

Today, tell someone "FUCK YOU."

SOME ADDED QUIPS:

Remember General Custer's famous last word:
"Where did all those fucking Indians come from?"

Also, the last words of the mayor of Hiroshima:
"What the fuck was that?"

And finally, the immortal words of the captain of the Titanic:
"Full speed ahead and fuck the icebergs!"



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